Author Archives


Mum of three.
X graphic designer turned mum. When the need to go back out to work arrived, I became a Clinical Support Worker completely by accident. I was a support worker for 9 years and was actually awarded Clinical Support Worker of the Year 2011 at my trust.
I have just completed a 2 year University course as a Trainee Nursing Associate and now I am one of the countries first registered Nurse Associates. I am also a Paediatric based Nurse Associate which makes me quite rare. I have been married for 25 years.


After a week off work, suffering with a case of flu, I headed off into London for the weekend with daughter number 2, who had got me tickets for the ‘Back to the Future Musical’ show at the Adelphi Theatre on Sunday afternoon.

This had been planned for a couple of months and we had decided to make it a weekend trip and booked, and paid for, a hotel for 2 nights. Neither of these could be changed or refunded, so it was a case of we’re going whatever!!

Marjorie has also been suffering a bit this week too but we both got up on Saturday, took a couple of Lateral Flow tests to confirm that we both just have seasonal flu, and headed off into London.

We made a perfect team this weekend.
I have been left with Eustachian Tube Dysfunction, which means I feel like I have water in my ears ALL THE TIME and I’m a bit deaf because of it.
Marjorie has completely lost her voice and can barely whisper.
So in noisy environments, I couldn’t hear anything and Marjorie couldn’t talk!!

Anyway, Saturday was a case of heading into London just to have a bit of a look around.
We arrived at the hotel just after midday and then went to get on the DLR.
We choose this hotel because we don’t get charged a congestion fee, the hotel is out of the city so relatively cheap, the parking is roughly £10 a day and the DLR is literally on the doorstep, so getting into and out of the city is a doddle.
However, for this weekend only, the first few stations from Beckton were closed for engineering works!!
We had a slight panic before a lovely gentleman pointed us in the direction of the replacement bus service that took us to the next available station.
Bit of a pain each morning and evening but nothing major, and still practically on the doorstep of the hotel.

We started by stopping off at Royal Victoria and getting the Cable Car to North Greenwich and then we headed off to Westminster to take a look at Big Ben now that it’s not covered with scaffolding. We headed past parliament square where there was some sort of Brexit protest on the go. Seriously! give it a rest. It’s been 5 years. The country voted OUT. This is supposed to be a democracy. That’s the way it works!!

Anyway, we headed into St James’s park, marvelled at all the squirrels and parrots!!

We walked across to The Mall and headed down through Admiralty Arch, past Trafalgar Square and down The Strand to get our barings for the Adelphi Theatre the next day. This is where we realised how close to Covent Garden the Adelphi Theatre was.
We had a nosey around The Whisky Exchange and picked up some Limoncello and Chambourd and decided that we were beginning to feel a bit wiped out, so we headed over to Regent Street where we wandered down to Hamleys to have a little browse before dinner.
I treated myself to a new Star Wars themed Loungefly backpack and then we really started to flag.

We had pre-booked a table at the Carnaby Patty and Bun so that Marji could have one of the incredible Gluten Free burgers and it was just as scrummy as the last time. She was happy.
Then we headed back to the hotel to check in and crash!

We got a message earlier in the day from Ian’s Cousin Debi, who lives in London with her partner Greg, and we arranged to meet up on Sunday morning for brunch.
So Sunday morning we got into Covent Garden, initially very early and it was really wet! so we sat in a Cafe Nero for a bit to dry off and have a fabulous mocha coffee and then we met Debi and Greg and finally found a table suitable for both Gluten Free and Vegan at The Black Penny.
We had a lovely catchup before parting ways and heading back into Covent Garden for a mooch around before the show.

We found ourselves in the Doc Marten’s shop and both of us got new winter boots and then we headed back to The Whiskey Exchange. Marjorie wanted some gin and I had spotted something I wanted the previous day.
I wanted the bottle more than anything!! The contents won’t last too long.

Sat next to a regular bottle for comparison!

Then we headed to the show which was absolutely amazing.
The special effects, particularly on the car were astounding.
When the car first appears on the stage, it did so in a lightning crash and literally appeared, out of nowhere, and came to a screeching halt on the stage.
When the car was supposed to be moving at high speeds, the technique used really made it feel like the car was moving at high speed.
The end of the show when Doc comes to take Marty back to the future, see Doc and Marty strap themselves into the car and they take off!! They head out over the audience and spin a full 360 degrees, it was so clever.

The actor playing Doc brown was hysterical and there was something very familiar about him.
I found out today that he was an actor called Roger Bart. Not an istantly recognisable name but definately a recognisable face. He’s been in loads of stuff that I’ve seen which is why he was so familiar.

After the show, we headed for The Hawksmoor Borough in London Bridge for my dinner treat.
I’ve been to the Hawksmoor in Seven Dials a few times and wanted to try a different one.
It did not dissapoint.
Great atmosphere, great food, little bit on the pricey side but for something a little bit more special, highly recommended.

Then we waddled our way back to the underground and made our way back to Beckton, loaded with Big boxes, back packs and a double Magnum of Jack Daniels.

It was a lovely weekend despite the fact that both of us are recovering from flu.
Kind of put a bit of a dampener on the weekend because we were both so tired, but never the less, still enjoyable.
It has pointed out that I really need to work on my fitness. I have plans for New York at the end of next year and want to make the most of it!!


It’s been a rough week this week.
Not mentally, but physically.

I woke up this morning (at 10am!!) to storm damage across the town.
Apparently we had a pretty big storm last night, not that I really knew anything about it.
I’ve been battling a flu all week and it has been sitting in my ears making me quite deaf. I feel like I have my head in a bucket of water. I can hear myself talking and eating and I really have to have the TV turned up if I’m watching it, I have tinnitus that sounds like a whooshing constantly but other than that…. nothing. I can’t even hear myself tapping on the keyboard as I write this.
I believe this is a condition called Eustachian tube dysfunction and I’ve had it before.
Annoying as it is, it will eventually go away.

It all started last Thursday as I woke up to an irritation in my throat and nose. It felt like the start of a cold and nothing major. I did a lateral flow test that confirmed it wasn’t anything to worry about and I just got on with my day.
Friday was pretty much the same. It felt like a bad cold. LFT was negative, so I just got on with my day like I had a bad cold.

However, over the weekend things took a turn for the worse. My head felt like it was going to explode. It was all behind my eyes, in my ears, on my chest. Eyes streaming, nose streaming and I hurt all over. It was definitely a flu and not just a cold. LFT was still showing negative so definitely not COVID!

I have been off work all week and confirmed today that I would be off the rest of the week.
Things haven’t got any worse since Tuesday evening but I still feel rubbish and I’ve been sleeping a lot.
Apparently through a horrendous thunder storm that has wrecked the town and I’ve just found out that it’s brought the ceilings down at work so they’ve had to be re-located!

I’m hoping that by resting completely today and tomorrow, I will be well enough to at least enjoy my weekend.
I’m going away for a couple of days with Marjorie to London. She got me tickets to see ‘Back To The Future, The Musical’ for my birthday on Sunday afternoon. We have our usual hotel in Beckton booked for Saturday and Sunday nights and we return to Bedford on my birthday on Monday. None of it can be changed or refunded, so fingers crossed!

So it’s been a bit of a miserable week.
Plenty of time to catch up on some TV though. I’m currently working my way through S3 and S4 of The Handmaid’s Tale, before S5 starts in the UK this weekend.

Murron’s been cooking dinners, which is nice.
She doesn’t clear up afterwards, which is not so nice.
You win some, you lose some.
No news on the house move yet which is really frustrating but expected.

That’s it.
I’m going back to bed and back to my TV.
Hope your week has been better.

DISH OF THE WEEK # 83 – Adam Driver

It’s time to get back to some normality.
The last few months have been tumultuous but we are now settling down as a family and heading into a new future.

It is by no means over as we are in the process of buying a new home and moving.
This will hopefully be happening before Xmas, but as with everything to do with moving house, these things don’t always go to plan, or quickly
The mortgage is secure, despite the mini budget backfire.
The solicitor has done their searches and enquiries and we await their report.
The sitting tennants legally have until 17th Nov to move out.
We just await everything to fall into place before the next round of chaos starts.

I am going to do something that I haven’t done in a long time.
A dish of the week.

I haven’t done one of these since March 1st 2020!!
For one reason or another, it just wasn’t the time or didn’t feel right.
So after having a bit of a crawl around the internet this evening, I thought it was about time I caught up with an old favourite.

Long time readers of my blog will know that I an a HUGE fan of Adam Driver, so it will come as no surprise that Dish of the Week # 83 is Adam Driver.

We were spoilt last year after lockdown with not one, but three Adam movies.
Annette, The last Duel and House of Gucci.

Three very different films with one of them a musical!!

Anyway, I have come to know that Adam likes to choose very different types of film and will often choose a film because of the director.
He has worked with Ridley Scott several times, Noah Baumbach several times, Jim Jarmousch several times, Terry Gilliam, Spike Lee and Martin Scorsese to name just a few.

There are currently 4 films listed for Adam Driver on IMDB.
White noise has completed filming and is being release at various film festivals right now.
65 is in post production and aiming for release in April 23.
Enzo Ferrari is currently filming with a very general date of 2023 for release
Megalopolis is in pre-production with no date given.

Adam is not afraid to give himself very different looks but he usually gets to keep his hair in some fashion.
He has just had a film released at the London film festival that see’s him in a suit to pad him out and give him a paunch.
White Noise, Directed by Noah Baumbach will get select theatre releases in Nov and will stream on Netflix at the end of December. However, it is not one of my favourite looks on him!!

IMDB states “At once hilarious and horrifying, lyrical and absurd, ordinary and apocalyptic, White Noise dramatizes a contemporary American family’s attempts to deal with the mundane conflicts of everyday life while grappling with the universal mysteries of love, death, and the possibility of happiness in an uncertain world.”

Adam’s last outing with Noah Baumbach got him an Oscar nomination for best actor and judging by the trailer for White Noise, this film could be looking at some Oscar nods too. Fingers crossed.

65 is set for a release date of April 2023, and so far we have absolutely zip when it comes to pictures or trailers.
IMDB states “An astronaut crash lands on a mysterious planet only to discover he’s not alone.”
The only people listed in the credits are Adam and two young girls, Chloe Coleman and Ariana Greenblatt.
I know it’s a sci-fi movie and I know that dinosaurs are involved.
I know that it is in post production, and has been for quite some time because of the required special effects.
I know that I am intrigued.

Enzo Ferrari is currently filming in Italy and for this one, they have pushed the envelope when it comes to Adams look.
They have actually cut and dyed his hair, pinned his ears back and padded him out in places.

The film is about the life story of Italian sports car entrepreneur Enzo Ferrari.
Adam is a big man and I’m looking forward to seeing how they squeeze him into a Ferrari but I don’t think I will ever forgive them for cutting his hair!!

Megalopolis is in pre-production and currently has no release date.
IMDB states “An architect wants to rebuild New York City as a utopia following a devastating disaster”
It is a Francis Ford Coppola film and he wrote the script in the early 1980s but the film always took a backseat to his other projects. By the time he was ready to move into production in 2001, the September 11 attacks happened and shut the production down as the film is based in New York City and details the attempts of an architect to reconstruct a utopian version of the city following a mega-disaster.
I have no idea what part Adam will play in this movie, but he will be joined by Dustin Hoffman, Jon Voight, Forest Whitaker, Aubrey Plaza, Nathalie Emmanuel and Shia LaBeouf to name a few.

Even though Adam likes to change his look for films, he always goes back to his usual red carpet look of ‘the man in black’ and his hair always recovers…. thankfully.

He remains a quiet and unashamed character.
He is getting better when it comes to red carpets but he clearly still hates them.
But I still love him.


I am very aware that I haven’t blogged any of my usual stuff for a while.
No film reviews or obsessions.
The fact is that there has been an awful lot going on over the last few months so my blogging has turned into more of a diary for a while. It’s quite therapeutic and it’s also a great way of keeping long distance family in on the loop of what’s been happening.

They say that some of the biggest stressors in life are the death of a spouse or loved one, moving house, finances/debt, and starting a new job.

Well in the last 8 months I have done all 4 and a bit more.
3 of them in the last 2 months alone!

I think I am currently in self preservation mode and trying to keep on top of everything and get my girls and myself sorted and settled into a new future before I have any kind of a break down, but fingers crossed I don’t.

Just over 8 months ago, I started a new job, and although a big stressor at the time, it has proved to be one of the best job moves I have ever made.
That same job is now one of the main reasons I am as ‘together’ as I am right now as it has been MORE than understanding about the last 2 months events and has meant that it has been at least one thing I have not had to worry about.

I suppose it all really started in June, when daughter number one, Murron and my grandson returned home after a relationship breakdown.
They are still sleeping on my dining room floor and I have had to write them an eviction notice to get things moving for them. That notice runs out on 16th Sept and I can see them going into emergency housing for a short while. It’s a horrible thing to have to do to your own kid but if we didn’t, she could be sleeping on my dining room floor indefinately as she is not a priority!! Makes me so mad.
At least me and Murron are in complete agreement that we couldn’t live together for good, so doing what is necessary has not been taken to heart.

July 5th to August 4th were a whirlwind with the passing of my husband Ian, and subsequent funeral.
This all had the knock on effect with finances.
The sudden loss of more than half our income.
How was I going to keep up with the rent?
How was I going to keep up with 2 loan payments that were ‘unfortunately’ in my name alone!!

Thankfully Ian had 2 over 50’s life policies that paid out very quickly and these helped deal with funeral costs and gave us a buffer for our current rental costs.
Ian also had his head screwed on when it came to his pension and work life insurance.
This has all but wiped out my financial concerns and is now helping us to a new future, and after long discussions with the 2 daughters who will be staying with me, we have decided that we would be better off financially if we owned our own property rather than rent.
We have been lucky enough to find the perfect property just around the corner from where we currently live.
Same distance from my Mum and Dad, same local amenities, so no change in anything other than the address.
Our offer has been accepted and now we face the agonizing wait for all the ‘legal’ stuff to go through and hope that nothing happens to make the sale fall through.

Luckily we do not have a chain and neither does the house we are buying.
The money from Ian has given us a sizeable deposit and I have a small mortgage in principle.
My concern now is ‘actually’ being accepted for that mortgage when they do hard search with the credit agencies as the 2 loans that I have just settled could take up to 6 weeks to clear!!
The bank are fully aware of this as they made adjustments when they did the soft search. I have provided all the necessary proof that the loans are paid and I now just await my full application video call on the 7th to find out for sure.

Once I have my mortgage, it’s then all in the hands of the solicitors.
Until I have signed a contract and paid the deposit I am trying not to get too excited.
Of course, once I have done that, there is a whole new set of things to worry about like ‘actually’ moving!! and having a big enough crossover period that I can clean and put right a few things in the house we are currently renting before I hand the keys back.

It’s never ending!!
I am kind of looking forward to a time, in hopefully the not too distant future, where I can sit down and process everything that has happened this year.
Nothing financially going wrong, the move done and dusted, Murron sorted and in her own place, back to work, time to just enjoy the new house and make it ours and sit and think of Ian occasionally.
Nothing actually going wrong for a change.

Nearly there.


So, it’s about time I broke my silence.

My last couple of posts had been a run down of what life was throwing at us. Some good, some bad.

Work was/is going great.
Marji Graduated and finally getting the surgery she’s been fighting for on her foot.
Dharma just getting on with work and thinking about finishing her degree next year.
A trip to see Imagine Dragons in the rain.
Ian still suffering with his orthopaedic problems but finally getting the surgeries that he needed started.
Murron’s relationship breakdown and ending up back home with our grandson and the pair of them now sleeping on our dining room floor with their belongings in storage.
Ian finally catching Covid after over 2 years with a good bought of tonsillitis thrown in for good measure and actually spending a couple of nights in hospital because of it.

It was all a bit more involved than that and you can read the whole story HERE and HERE

The last post was on July 2nd.
On July 5th, our world changed completely and forever with the very sudden and unexpected passing of my husband and best friend of 30 years, Ian.

After fighting Psoriatic Arthritis for over 20 years and a case of Covid and tonsillitis that landed him in hospital, it was finally a heart attack that got him.
July 5th had started out as a pretty good day.
I had been working from home and Ian had actually been feeling a lot better and actually spent some time playing with little JJ in the morning, for the first time in about a week.
At lunch time, he helped Dharma with a wiring problem in her bedroom and then he went to lay down for a bit because he wasn’t feeling too good and this was nothing out of the ordinary for Ian.
With his Orthopaedic issues, he would quite often relax in his bedroom in the afternoons and do some reading.
I finished work at 4pm, signed off and went to sit in the garden with friends for a cool drink in the sun and literally, just 10 minutes later, Dharma went to see Ian and all hell broke loose. The next four hours saw the house filled with paramedics, police and funeral directors.
I knew he had been gone for a while when me and Murron started CPR, but the paramedics still worked on him for over half and hour.
I owe a huge thank you to an off duty police officer called Carly, who literally appeared out of knowhere, running up our stairs and taking over the situation. I was in pieces and my nurse training just went right out the window!!

The funeral took place on August 4th and Ian entered the crematorium to The Imperial March by John Williams.
We simultaniously laughed and cried! It was a beautiful service and the celebrant was amazing. She had picked up on all the family quirks and craziness and got a few personal touches into the service that I knew nothing about. Quite simply, she got us! and Ian would have loved it.
The rest of the afternoon was spent in the sun with Family, friends, and Ian’s work colleagues at a local pub.

We are now trying to get our lives back on track.
Murron is still fighting to get a council house and off of our dining room floor, but because she technically has a roof over her head, she’s not a priority, even though she’s sleeping on a dining room floor with an 11 month old! Go figure.
I have actually had to give her an eviction notice to change her priority. How fair is that! It just doesn’t sit right with me either!!

I cannot continue to pay the rent in our current house without Ian’s wages but Ian’s insurance and pensions pots have enabled us to do something me and Ian had been wanting to do for years and actually buy a house.
We’ve been really lucky and found a place already. We just need everything to fall into place now so that we don’t lose it.
It is marked as Sold subject to contract.
We have a solicitor starting all the paperwork.
We have some of the money from Ian but are still waiting for some to make it to the bank account. I am getting a little frustrated by it all. I know they have to be careful, but at the same time, there is a family who are relying on this money to keep going!!
I have a list of things that we would like to get for the new house, but until it is 100% in the bag, that list will have to wait.
I see a big Ikea shop on the horizon!!
It’s going to be a long few months but, fingers crossed, we will be in by Xmas.

Marjorie is recovering well from her surgery and the rod in her toe has now been removed and she is getting on with her life pain free. She still has some post surgery healing pain but it is getting better day by day.

Dharma is doing OK. She’s back at work at the weekends and she is looking forward to starting her final year of Uni.
I am keeping my eye on her. She found Ian that day and so far, she hasn’t really opened up about it.

I have 101 things going round in my head all day every day, but it’s getting less and less each day as I tick things off.
Work have been amazing so they are not one of the things going round in my head and the GP has been backing me up with sick notes.

I am currently signed off until Sept 16th and by then, I hope that finances have all settled down and the purchase of the house is well and truly under way and my head has calmed down to just a few things going round and round.
We are continuing to have a good sort out around the house and garage in preparation for a move and we are spending time together as a family.
We have baby JJ with us daily so there is constant laughter in the house. I am going to miss him when he’s moved out…. I will NOT miss the chaos and the mess.
We have really good friends who check in on us regularly and life is very different.

I am now looking forward to getting back to work and, like I said, we hope to be moved by Xmas which will allow a completely fresh start in 2023. I’m not holding my breath on that one but it would be nice.


So as you can see from the last post, things have been a bit interesting over the last two weeks.

To make it even more tricky, and something I didn’t mention in the last post is that Ian tested positive for Covid last Saturday when we had to go and grab Murron’s stuff from her ex-partner’s house.
We found this little nugget out AFTER we had arrange the van and storage hire so he spent all day Saturday sitting in the van on his own because he was the nominated driver, while me, Murron, my Brother and his mate Jason, cleared out the house and unloaded at the storage unit and followed him around in our cars.

Because the hubby is positive, I have been sleeping on the sofa, and right about now, my body is screaming.
I did cave and sleep in the bed last night because he’s not coughing as much but I feel like I’m dodging a bullet!

This put even more pressure on poor Marjorie who was trying to get to surgery on Monday and was already staying clear of her Covid positive sister!
Anyway, thankfully she stayed clear and made it to Surgery on Monday and everything went well. She has been mobile and comfortable ever since and fingers crossed, she feels there is an improvement already. She has a follow up appointment with the surgeon next week and they will do a wound check but so far, so good. Keeping my fingers crossed for her that this has done the trick and she can finally walk, pain free for the first time in around 10 years.

So, Monday night, I thought that nothing else could possibly go wrong.
Marjorie was comfortable after a long day at the hospital.
Murron and JJ were settling in nicely and we were all getting used to the new routine.
Dharma was on the mend and Ian was keeping himself to himself and staying away from everyone and feeling a bit rough.
However….. Tuesday morning saw Ian taking a turn for the worse.
He was finding breathing laborious and could barely swallow.
We have a finger saturations monitor and it showed that when he was awake and sitting upright his oxygen levels were fine, but when he laid down they dropped to 94% and when he was asleep the dropped to 88%.
So after having a look at 111 online and having a chat with the GP, they all suggested getting an ambulance.
This did not go to plan.
Because Ian was talking and not in any immediate danger, the wait for an ambulance would be around 12 hours!
There was nothing for it, I took him to the hospital in the car myself.

We arrived in A+E at 16:00 and things then happened really slowly.
Eventually he got a cannula and IV paracetamol and he got an X-ray to check his lungs.
The Dr then informed us that he had really nasty tonsillitis on top of his Covid so he was started on IV antibiotics and Diflam spray.
At 02:30 they decided to keep him in hospital over night so that is where I left him.
He didn’t make it to a ward until midday the next day!

His oxygen levels were dropping right down to 86% at this point but they were self correcting very quickly so he didn’t require any oxygen, but because they didn’t know why his levels were plummeting all the time, the Drs decided they needed a scan of his lungs to check for clots and they kept him a second night.
The scan was all clear and they let him home on Thursday with antibiotics.
Ian is now much better, still positive, but feeling better each day.

In the middle of all the drama over the last two weeks I received a phone call myself.
A few weeks ago I self referred myself to the physio therapy service.
Experience has taught me that going to the GP would then involve being referred to the Muscular skeletal service, who would then refer me to physios before I get any kind of referral to a surgeon, so I cut out the middle man and referred myself.
They called me for a chat last week and after about 15 minutes they informed me that because I had given an extensive description of the problem and after a few quick questions, they were referring me to an Orthopaedic surgeon because they think I need an arthroscopy on my knee.

So! after all that has happened over the last two weeks, things are finally turning in the right direction again.
Marjorie is going from strength to strength and is walking around and fully weight bearing and fairly comfortable.
Dharma is FINALLY testing negative.
Ian is eating solid food again and feeling much better but still positive for now.
Murron is really happy and settled in the decision she’s made to be a single Mum and JJ is more than happy with all the fuss he’s getting from his Aunts and made a little friend when he went to a toddler morning at kidsworld yesterday and met one of Murron’s mates kids.

I have been holding it all together.
Apart from the ongoing issue with my knee I’m fine. I have been Covid testing on a daily basis because I work with patients but other than that, I have just been taking it all one day at a time.
I am now counting down three weeks when I will then be having 2 weeks of annual leave.
In the meantime, I am going to get on top of all the cleaning and gardening so I can just relax and enjoy it!!



Generally life has been going OK.

Ian has his ongoing health issues that he is finally getting the surgeries he needs for, or the usual money worries and just scraping through on payday.
My house is usually pretty tidy, the washing stays up to date and I can’t remember the last time I had huge piles of ironing to get through. The gardens are pretty much under control, especially after we finally got the landlord to take down the HUGE laylandii in the back garden and we personally got the same guy to buzz down the hedges in the front garden.
Marji finally got the go ahead on the surgery she’s been waiting for for over two years and this will take place this coming monday.
Nothing unexpected and nothing out of the ordinary and work is actually going great!

I had a lovely week of annual leave last week.
I chilled, I attended Marjorie’s Graduation and I saw Imagine Dragons in the rain on Saturday.
That was it, or so I thought.

I was chilling and getting ready to go back to work on Sunday when the shit literally hit the fan and life threw one of it’s curve balls at us.

The family now know and Murron has given me permission to blog about it.

I received a message from my eldest daughter, Murron, who moved to Kettering with her partner a year and a half ago, informing me that the relationship was over.
To be honest, I had suspected something over the last few weeks because Murron just wasn’t quite right when I talked to her on FB video messenger.
She said that she had felt like a single mum for the last 2 or 3 months because her partner just won’t do anything and doesn’t get involved with helping to look after my grandson, JJ, or help out around the house and just doesn’t want to do anything other than sit on his computer playing games.
Murron had given him warning after warning and even told him she was leaving and started to pack things up but nothing changed, so on Monday, she packed up a few emergency bits and headed back to Bedford to stay with us and start to sort out housing.

Things were initially quite amicable and I don’t think her partner really believed Murron was actually seriously leaving, but on Weds, when she still hadn’t come home, the penny finally dropped and his attitude started to change.
To be honest, his attitude sucks and I did think better of him but after what he did on Weds I lost whatever respect I had for him and think he’s an absolute arsehole.

Murron had asked him NOT to remove her from the Universal Credit until she had housing sorted but he went ahead and did it anyway. This has just made her task ten times harder because it’s harder to get housing without benefits and harder to get benefits without an address.

Then he started to get shitty about when she was going to collect her stuff because he wanted the house key back, so we made the decision to hire a storage unit and a van and went to the house today to get everything.
Thankfully my brother and his mate Jason were on hand to help out with the first load of heavy stuff and then the second load consisted of all the smaller boxes and clothes which we are going to have to sort through tomorrow before taking it all to the storage unit.
Her partner did the sensible thing and stayed away from the property for the day, but he’s in for a shock when he gets home because most of the furniture was Murrons!
She’s ticked off too because all of the bags that she had already packed had been ripped open and looked through.
The house looked ransacked when we arrived and even more ransacked when we left.

To make the week even harder, my youngest daughter tested positive for Covid on Wednesday so has been isolating and trying to stay away from her sister who is having surgery on Monday and needs to be Covid free.
So far Marji’s required lateral flows have been negative but it’s getting worrying because Ian tested positive this morning too!!
That means I’ll be sleeping on the sofa for a few days because I can’t afford to get Covid again, especially not this week.
It’s a busy week at work and getting Covid is really going to put a spanner in the works.

So I’m sitting here this evening not knowing whether to laugh or cry.
I am so tired after today but I am not ready for sleep.
At least I get a bit of a lay in tomorrow before having to sort through the mountains of clothes Murron has brought home. She needs to get rid of a lot, but getting her to do it is going to be difficult because she likes to hang on to some real shit!

I’m hoping that’s the end of problems for a while.
I think it’s enough.
Let us get Murron sorted and life back on track before life throws anything else at us!!!


So, it’s been a week of ‘mostly’ relaxing.
I’ve started a tough little project in the back garden but I’m going to take my time over it.

It’s a hidden little area at the back end of the garden. It can’t be seen from the patio area which I’ve put most of my work into, but it can be seen from the dining room and it’s beginning to really bug me.
I plan to just tidy it up a bit and hopefully get a little rockery and some flowering plants in there and make it all a bit easier to maintain. We’ll see.

I went to Marjorie’s graduation.
A year late because of Covid restrictions but it didn’t make me any less proud of her.

I went to see Imagine Dragons for second time. Still fantastic!

Ian has healed well from his surgery and now awaits a follow up and a decision on the other arm and also an appointment with Addenbrooks about his neck. So ongoing for him, but at least it’s started to happen.

The surprise of the week was the phone call out of the blue for Marjorie, offering her a surgery on her foot on the 27th June from a surgeon she’s never even met!!
She’s seeing him on Thursday and having a pre-assessment on Friday.
It’s all very odd, as the previous 2 ‘private’ surgeons she went to see via the NHS both said they wouldn’t do any surgery.
The surgeon she grew up with, who fixed her hips and then took her on because of the Freiburgs in her foot, retired towards the end of Covid lockdown and it looks like a surgeon from the hospital has picked up his waiting list which Marjorie has been on now for over 2 years. We’re hoping he will do the two step procedure her original surgeon suggested, but that will all be discussed on Thursday.

So! Two members of the family having surgery.

The week went really well and things were going swimmingly until some news that hit a bit hard this lunch time.
Can’t go into any more detail just yet, but needless to say, the blood pressure I had been hoping to drop a little has now gone back through the roof!

Life always has a way making sure you don’t have things too easy.

The big decision is a bit of a heads up, as I’m seriously thinking about giving up my WordPress!!
When I look at it, I’m just venting and moaning on it most of the time.
Things that used to give me pleasure have been neglected. I haven’t done a Dish of the Week for over two years now.
The annual cost is coming up for needing to be paid next month and I’m seriously thinking about stopping.
Let me know what you think.

So, back to work tomorrow and about the only thing in my life that is currently not giving me any stress!


Sometimes I get very worried about things going on in the world.
Take the current WAR going on with Russia and Ukraine.
And WAR is exactly what it is.
The devastation it has caused to millions of innocent people who were just trying to get on with their lives and the fact that Putin said he wouldn’t invade time and time again, yet here we are….. but OH!! It’s not an invasion, it’s apparently a ‘special military operation’.
NO, it’s a WAR.
We have seen the russians showing their nuclear capabilities but say they are just ‘testing’.
Do we believe them?
I’m certainly very sceptical about ANYTHING they say they won’t do, because they just go ahead and do it anyway.

The sad part is that the people of Russia are so brainwashed by what they see on TV because they only get what’s fed to them by Putin, that they don’t have a clue what’s really happening and how the rest of the world currently percieve them. They are now suffering because of all the sanctions but they believe it is the rest of the world unfairly causing it and not the actions of Putin making it necessary.
When they finally wake up and smell the roses it’s not going to be pretty!!
Putin really scares me at the moment. The only saving grace is that the military leaders surrounding him and supporting him are slowly beginning to see the error of his ways. Hopefully they will have the balls to bite back and take control at some point.

Before Russia however, and still bubbling in the background, is America.
When I was a young girl, I used to dream of visiting and even living in America.
I still want to go for the occasional visit but I categorically wouldn’t want to live there anymore.

Where shall I start?

The whole lack of health care for a start.
If me and Ian were to live there, with all our current health conditions, we’d be bankrupt.
Ian’s medication alone would cost us thousands of Dollars a month.
Ian would never be able to work again because we wouldn’t be able to afford the multiple surgeries he needs.
He would literally just live the rest of his life in cripalling pain that gets progressively worse until he dies.
Here in the UK, he was just paying £10.40 a month and this got him ALL of his medication, regardless of how many items it consisted of, and I say WAS, because now that he has been disgnosed with Diabetes, he gets it all for FREE.
He also gets his surgeries for free. There may be waiting lists and frustration with lack of communication between services, but at the end of the day, he gets the surgery he needs to get on with his life.

Americans and their attitude to GOD.
My beliefs as an athiest are going to be enough to get me into trouble. I couldn’t hold my tongue for very long with an American spouting about living life under God direction and looking down at me because I don’t attend church.
The fact that GOD is mentioned in politics makes my blood boil, especially when it is currently being used to change the laws on womens health rights and sending them back to the dark ages.

But my main concern at the moment is that American are living life based off of a constituion written 235 years ago.
A constitution which was groundbreaking and relavent at that time but has become outdated and totally innapropriate now, and yet we see it’s affect pretty much on a daily basis in the news.
Particularly the 2nd Amendment giving Americans the ‘right to bear arms’ that certain American’s will argue about until they are blue the face. It is, after all, their ‘consitutional right!’.

But when you see the aftermath of that ‘right’ in the news as frequently as we do. Surely something seriously needs to be done about it.
When you put it into context, according to, between 2009 and 2018 school shootings across the globe were rank like this….

8th place = Azerbaijan, China, Estonia, Germany, Greece, Hungary, Kenya, Russia, and Turkey, with only 1 shooting.
7th place = Brazil, Canada, and France, with 2 shootings.
6th place = Afganistan, with 3 shootings.
5th place = Nigeria and Pakistan, with 4 shootings.
4th place = India, with 5 shootings.
3rd place = South Africa, with 6 shootings.
2nd place = Mexico, with 8 shootings.
1st place = United States, with 288 shootings.

288!! Let that sink in.

In 2022, the recent Uvalde shooting that killed 19 students and two teachers was the 27th school shooting in the USA so far THIS YEAR! That’s just over 4 per month.
Kids shouldn’t be scared to go to school.
Parents shouldn’t have to worry about their child’s safety at school.
The Government should have the balls to stand up to the National Rifle Association and do something.

Do you know who aren’t on that list?
UK and Australia

In the UK, in 1996, when 16 children ages 5 and 6 were targeted, along with their teacher, by a former Scout leader in the Scottish town of Dunblane, British lawmakers effectively banned private ownership of all handguns in mainland Britain, giving the country some of the strictest anti-gun legislation in the world. Authorities also introduced a firearm amnesty, resulting in the surrender of thousands of guns.
Members of the public are allowed to own rifles for sports and shotguns, provided they are licensed to do so. 
There have been NO reported shootings in schools since.

In Australia, just weeks after a lone gunman killed 35 people in 1996, at a cafe in the tourist town of Port Arthur, Tasmania, Australian authorities, despite fierce opposition from the gun lobby, passed strict gun control legislation, including a ban on semi-automatic rifles and semi-automatic and pump-action shotguns.
As part of the reforms, thousands of unlicensed firearms were surrendered. All licensed gun owners were required to take a safety course. Some 650,000 firearms were confiscated and destroyed. 
There were 13 mass shootings in Australia in the 18 years before the legislation was adopted, resulting in more than 100 deaths. There were NO mass shootings for 14 years after the laws were passed. There have been few incidents in Australia since the laws were enacted, and NO school shootings.


And yet, Americans will argue that it is their ‘right’ to bear arms.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again.
The 2nd AMENDMENT is just that, an AMENDMENT!!
By the very definition of the word AMENDMENT, it’s already been changed, so why is no-one challenging this and changing it again to bring it up to 21st century standards?
The Constitution was written at a time when Flintlock pistols were the weapon of choice, not semi-automatic rifles and modern day handguns.

Then today, I open the news to 31 white supremacists being arrested at an Idaho gay pride event.
They are members of the Patriot Front Group which was formed in 2017 after the deadly Unite the Right rally in Charlottesville, Virginia. (Where a WHITE woman died, I might add)
What makes it even worse is they they were from 11 different states so had organised this, and travelled in specifically to target the event.
The groups manifesto calls for the formation of a white ethnostate in the US which makes me spitting mad because, because America is a diverse multiculture made up of immigrants and originally set up by invaders.
The only ‘TRUE’ Americans are the indiginous American Indians who were forced off of their land and almost wiped out by those invaders.

Anyway, that’s a whole nother blog all on it’s own.
So, as much as I want to see the spectacle of places like New York and the wonders of places like the Grand Canyon and only America can do Disney, and there are some amazing and colourful characters all across the country, and the fact that I KNOW that a lot of Americans are wonderful people, I could never bring myself to live in America as it is at the moment.
There’s just so much I don’t agree with and the idiots always seem to win or get urged on by more idiots and because of ‘their constitutional rights’, they think they have the right to force their views on everyone else.
I would end up getting arested for punching a said idiot and starting a riot myself!!


Put yourself in this scenario and tell me what you would think or do in the same situation.

You’re just 25 years old and you have your whole life already planned for you.
You are bound by your duty.
You don’t have the luxury of doing what you want, when you want, EVER again.
No going to the cinema, no going out for dinner and a drink with mates, no jam nights at the local music venues, no going on a last minute holiday, no changing jobs if you don’t like the one you’ve got. Would you accept that?
You are governed by your duty to your country and, to some, this seems like a luxury or a waste of money.
You will never be able to do all those normal things…. EVER.
Your days are timed to the minute with meetings and events. Even on days where you wish you could just give something a miss and have a day off, it’s not going to happen.
Imagine, living your ENTIRE life like this. Never being able to do exactly what you want to do……….

I’ve been getting a little upset with people poo pooing the Jubilee celebrations.
Yes, there are some things about the Monarchy that need to change and things that some of them get up to that I don’t agree with, but when all is said and done, the Monarchy, with all its pomp and circumstance, generates about 19 BILLION pounds for the British Economy every year.
The cost to the tax payer is just £4.50 a year.
So I get a little upset when I see people shitting on people celebrating the Jubilee and pointing out the fact that there are so many food banks in the country and that the starving should be fed first!!


Attack the government for these failures and let the country have some pride in it’s Monarchy.
When did it become taboo to have some pride in your country?
Every other fucking country in the world has pride, including the horrendously governed USA!!

Elizabeth has given this country her life.
She gave up any semblence of a normal life at the age of just 25 when anyone else at the same age is partying and living it up and discovering who they actually are.
She did this without question.
She just accepted her responsibility and performed her duty to this country for her entire life.

It’s only 4 days of celebrations.
It’s going to take a damn site more to change what’s wrong with this country and that is up to the government and NOT the Monarchy.
Talk to the Government about re-directing some of that £19 BILLION to areas that need it.