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Mum of three.
X graphic designer turned mum.
Was a Clinical Support Worker. (Clinical Support Worker of the Year 2011!!)
Now a Trainee Nursing Associate and Married for 23 years.


On Friday, I had my last shift for just over two weeks.
It’s a lovely feeling knowing that you’re not having to get up for work.
I decided to tackle my garden over the weekend so that I have somewhere to sit and chill during my annual leave. It was an absolute jungle as it has quite literally been ignored for the last two years while I concentrated on Uni work.

Over the course of two days, my garden went from this….

To this…

The weather was lovely, the ice cold beer was flowing, the music was playing.
It’s amazing how much more agreeable gardening is when you haven’t got to squeeze it in between shifts! I won’t be re-stocking the borders this year. I just want to keep it simple and easy to maintain for a while.

Anyway, the plan was to have a bit of a lay in this morning, however……
Murron was at a jam night last night and brought home a few waifs and strays at 02:30.

Image may contain: 2 people, including Murron Abigail Winter, people smiling, selfie and close-up

Can’t really complain when one of them was Richie, the lead singer of the CC Smugglers!
After a bit of singing in the garage and a fire pit in my lovely tidy garden, they all finally called it a night at around 6am.
Of course, my body clock has now told me it’s time to get up for work, so I am wide awake with no hope of a lay in.

Richie, you owe me one!

So, my plan for the day….
Time to get on top of the cleaning in the house and then I’m having my hair cut at 3, ready for my trip to London with Murron.
We were hoping to get to the cinema later today but that all depends on whether I think we’ll stay awake or not after last night!

There is a movie due out on DVD today that I want to get so if we don’t go to the cinema, it will be a night in on the sofa.
It’s a movie I haven’t actually seen yet, but it looks really good!!
It’s based on the true story of Ruth Bader Ginsburg. An incredible woman who dared to enter a man’s world and made her name fighting for gender equality during the 60’s and 70’s. At 86 years old, she still holds the office of Associate Justice of the Supreme Court of the United States!

Right, if I get started now, I could have the house done and dusted before midday.


I keep this picture on my blog.
I keep it there for a reason.
It is a reminder to me that I am privileged!!

I have never been bullied because of the colour of my skin.
I have never been bullied for being queer.
I have never been told I am going to hell for just loving someone.
I have never been afraid to show my affection to my partner in public for fear of being beaten up or arrested.
I have never had to fight for the right to even marry my partner.
I have never had to fight for the same rights as a straight married couple.
I don’t live in a country where I could still be arrested or even executed for being gay.
I have never had the fear of being sent to conversion therapy to ‘be cured’

I am straight. I am white. I grew up in a straight white family.

So when I see articles cropping up this week, about a group in Boston, Massachusetts trying to organise a ‘Straight Pride’ Parade, I get pretty bloody angry!
Do they understand just why gay pride exists?
Do they realise just how privileged they are to not need a pride parade?Have they done their homework?

The fact that this year is also one of the biggest landmarks in the LGBTQ community, just makes the thought of a straight pride parade all the more nauseating.

It has been 50 years since the Stonewall riots in New York.
50 years since white, black and Hispanic gays, lesbians and transgendered people decided that enough was enough and fought back.
It has become the most important event of the gay liberation movement and is celebrated with gay pride parades around the world every year.

So forgive me if I get angry that some ‘privileged’ white men with links to far-right movements, nationalist protests and white supremacist organisations, feel like they’ve had their toes stepped on.

These people are filled with anger and hate.
The religious communities who won’t let their children be taught about all forms of relationships and genders are filled with anger and hate and are just teaching their children to fear what they don’t understand.

When I look at photos from gay pride parades around the world, and photos of queer couples and their families, you know what I see?
I see love.
I see happiness.
I see people wanting to live without fear.
I see people wanting exactly what straight people have and to be treated equally.

Look at the history of the parades, even if you only go to the Stonewall Riots wikipedia page to see how it all started. Educate yourselves before you decide to hate on people who only want to live and love.



It’s been a long couple of weeks with Ian recovering from surgery and the usual work and family stuff.

On the whole, it’s been a good couple of weeks.
Ian has recovered remarkably quickly. The wound on his neck has healed amazingly fast and if you weren’t already in the know, you wouldn’t think he’d even had surgery…..


His left arm is still very numb and is giving him some pain. He’s mobile but he is definitely favouring his left arm and I think this has set him back a bit mentally. I’m going to have to keep on top of this and push him to do things, like I did yesterday when I gave him a little push to get him to go to Tesco with me for a little shop. He didn’t ‘need’ to go but it got him out of the house for a bit and moving.
With that said, he has been making himself get up and do things around the house and he is now working on some of his model painting at the dining table instead of sitting at an awkward angle in bed reading. There’s a way to go yet but I think he’s going in the right direction.

The house is quiet at the moment. My middle daughter, Marjorie, is on a work training course in London. I haven’t seen her since Saturday evening because I was at work before she got up on Sunday and had left before I got home. We’ve had a couple of quick texts to say she’s still alive and another to say she’d just eaten… and I quote… ‘a well nice baked potato!!’.
I forget that she’s 19, going on 20 and that she is more than capable of spending a few days in London with work colleagues.
I do get a little bit worried when I discover a bottle of gin and a few cans of Monster going with her when helping her to pack!!

Anyway, the house is only going to get even more quiet this evening as Murron, my eldest, leaves to spend the evening with a friend before heading off to the Download festival for 5 days!

She’s had her hair braided so she doesn’t have to worry about it and she’s really excited.
I have to chuckle. The weather is abysmal at the moment. It’s going to be her first ‘wet’ festival. I dread to think what state she will be coming home in.

The weather is becoming a concern though. I have two weeks of annual leave planned from the 24th June to the 7th July.
In that two weeks I ‘MUST’ get my back garden back under control before jungle animals start to make themselves comfortable….. that said…. there are some really pretty weeds out there at the moment.

Even more worrying though, is that me and Murron are going to London for 4 days on the 27th because we are seeing Pink in concert on the 29th.
I wanted to spend a few days just wondering around London and going to places like Camden and Borough Market and wandering up and down the banks of the Thames soaking up the sun and stopping off at pubs and bars and checking out the arts festival down by Southbank.
At the minute…. it’s not looking great for the weather….. so keep everything crossed for me.

Work is probably the ‘only’ thing going to plan at the moment.
I finally got my NMC pin. I’m now in my official Nurse Associate uniform and doing what I’ve been studying for the last two years. There’s still a LOT to learn on the job but that just makes it more interesting. With that said, I do look forward to my days off. It’s a catch 22.

Right, back to today. I think I’m done with the computer for the day. I done some chores and I’ve read a little more of My book (I’ll blog about that one later).

Think it’s wine time and movie time.


So, after a year of waiting, Ian finally got his surgery on Tuesday.
To say it was a long day is an understatement.
We were both told he would be back on the ward in about 3 hours and he actually arrived back on the ward 8 hours later!!

To say I was going a little crazy was an understatement.
Both of the guys who went to surgery after Ian, were back on the ward while I was waiting for Ian to get back.
Every time the Health Care Assistant, who was looking after the bay, walked in, she said, “not back yet then?”.

She’s lucky I didn’t launch her through the window!

I finally got home just after 9pm. Effectively, a 17 hour shift!
Anyway, Ian was discharged and I went to collect him at lunchtime yesterday.

Anyway, Ian was kept on oxygen all night because the nurse doing his observations kept putting his oxygen saturation monitor on the same hand they were doing the blood pressure on! and wondering why his oxygen saturation was dropping! DOH!! Anyway, a nurse with a head on her shoulders took over in the morning and Ian was discharged pretty quickly.

I got some funny looks from the nurse in the discharge lounge as I interrupted her while I read through Ian’s discharge letter. I had a few niggly questions, that to be completely honest, I couldn’t be arsed to ask. The main questions were answered and we took our opportunity to leave.

We are now in a waiting game.
He is really mobile and handling pain well. The most pain is from the obvious wound from the operation itself. They went in from the front, by his eosophagus, trachea and voice box to get to his spine at the back!!
It turns out that the reason he was so long in surgery is that he had lots of calcinated bone, due to his arthristis, that they needed to drill through.
Unfortunately, this may have aggravated the nerve that they were trying to release.
This meant that he woke up in excruciating pain with increased numbness, and his arm was shaking uncontrollably.

His follow up is now 6 weeks instead of 12 weeks and the surgeon is ‘hopeful’ that the numbness in his arm will subside.

Ian is actually really mobile and I have noticed a difference in his comfort level already. He just seems to be on a bit of a downer because of the numbness. I’m going to have to crack the whip a little to get him to progress.

I’m back at work for just a day tomorrow and I’m not too worried about leaving him. My Mum will be around to check on him and all three of our girls will be around throughout the day.

The worst part is now over and we are in the recovery stage. I just hope that the numbness starts to wear off or Ian will have a really negative reaction and be on a mega downer!!

Time will tell.


So, this is where my brain is at in the mornings at the moment.
Pondering over a cup of milky coffee I have images and ideas popping into my head. All backed up with people on social media having similar ideas or fuelling new ones.

Since the release of the beautiful Vanity Fair official images for Star Wars Ep IX, I am now, even more convinced that the guy being slammed into the deck by Kylo in the first trailer……..

Is actually one of these guys……

One of his own Knights of Ren!

I am all kinds of giddy trying to figure out exactly what would make Kylo turn against his own Knights OR have his Knights turned against HIM!?

And then there was this image.

Specifically a very stern looking General Hux and Allegiant General Pryde.
That incredibly sexy Allegiant General uniform, filled out quite nicely by Richard E. Grant, and now that his character has a name, Tumblr has gone crazy!
Fan fiction is already being written that is definitely NSFW and taking the opportunity to create stories before we find out exactly who, exactly, this character is, or what he’s going to be like.
I just keep thinking about Richard’s perfect English accent and it gives me goose bumps! I cannot wait to see him brought to life in the film.

From my own perspective and particular interest in the Kylux (Kylo and Hux) fandom, General Pryde has put a bit of a spanner in the Kylo and Hux relationship! It’s all rather interesting and more than a little bit naughty!

Right, suppose I had better stop drooling and go and do some work.


Vanity fair and Annie Liebowitz, have just released the first images and some more behind the scenes photos for Star Wars Episode IX, in an article titled ‘Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, The Ultimate Preview’.
The full article can be read HERE

A few of the images really caught my attention and I just needed to get this off my chest…….

OMG!!! Adam is smoking!

The article goes on to reveal… FINALLY… our first good look at the Knights of Ren, on set with Director JJ Abrams. Mentioned and seen fleetingly in The Force Awakens, and then completely glossed over in The Last Jedi, these guys finally see the big screen proper in The Rise of Skywalker.

But there was one image that REALLY caught my attention.
I have always loved the look and uniforms of the Imperials in the original movies and the subsequent First Order look and uniforms in the current trilogy.

The bonus in the current trilogy is General Hux.
Not only is the uniform hot, he is played by one of my favourite actors, Domhnall Gleeson.

And then today, just when I thought that uniform couldn’t get any hotter, Vanity Fair go and release an image of General Hux and new character, Allegiant General Pryde, played by Richard E. Grant, and OMG!! The First Order uniform went from smoking hot to completely on fire.

Then I saw this and I really can’t wait to see this showdown.

7 months to go.
Absolute torture!

Go and give the article a read. Obviously there’s no real information about the film itself, but there are quite a few more images to look at.


It’s been 10 days since my last post.

10 days patiently waiting for Ian’s operation and hoping it won’t be cancelled again.
6 days left!!…..So far, so good.

10 days of finally getting my NMC pin number and working ‘officially’ as a Nurse Associate. It has been a little daunting. It has been extremely busy and I’m still on a steep learning curve and in at the deep end.

10 days of trying to get on top of things in the house and in the garden.
So far, the garden is winning. I’m just not feeling it!

10 days of saying ‘fuck it’ to the diet.
Life’s too short.

Followed by 10 days of saying ‘fuck it’, only 5 months until my 50th and I promised myself I would be slimmer and fitter!!

So! It’s a day off today.
The house is quiet as Dharma and Marjorie are house sitting for Mum and Dad for a few days. Ian is working upstairs and Murron is keeping herself to herself and will be off out shortly anyway.

The house is tidy. The garden is calling…… but not loud enough yet.
I’m debating getting my sketchbooks out. I keep toying with the idea and half heartedly doing some drawing before giving up.
I also have a book I want to start reading. ‘Mama’s Boy’ by Dustin Lance Black. The only problem with that is that it takes me forever to pick up a book in the first place, and then I’m a really slow reader, so it may be one that waits until I’m on annual leave with time to waste.

Not long to wait. I have two weeks of annual leave planned for the end of June. I’m going away with my eldest daughter for 4 of those days to London. We’ll be seeing P!nk in concert while we’re there. I’m just hoping the weather is good and we can do lots of wandering, drinking, eating and people watching. Actually really looking forward to it.

I have 2 x 12.5 hour shifts ahead of me before a weekend off.
I really should spend at least one day at the weekend tackling the gardens.

Today then……. will be spent with my movies and my computer.
Decision made.