I don’t know why I do it to myself.
Every year I will start a diet.
I’ll do well, feel great and then…….
I start going back to old ways.
I’ll start snacking again because… I’ve done so well, one snack won’t hurt.
I’ll start drinking again because…. I’ve done so well, I’ve worked so hard, I deserve it.
Before you know it, I’m back to square one.
Every time I eat the snacks or drink the alcohol I feel crap!
It’s not a treat anymore.
I feel bloated and horrible.
I undo all the good work I’d done previously!
So why do I bloody do it?!!
Time to crack the whip with myself.
I know where I’m going wrong. I’m not stupid.
The meals I actually eat aren’t bad, it’s what I drink with them or eat in between them that’s doing the damage.
When I was dieting before Italy last year, I would go for a walk if I felt like snacking or I would drink a glass of water.
So, time to get into that mind frame again.
I am fast heading for 50 and I’ll be damned if I’m bigger than a size 16 when I get there!
I spent a couple of hours going through my Uni work this afternoon and making sense of what still has to be done and try to work out a time frame for writing.
It’s now a little clearer and I have absolutely no idea how I’m going to manage it all so looking after myself and not moping into snacks, wine and beer is probably a good start.
It’s a long work week this week.
Early shift tomorrow with two long days back to back on Thursday and Friday.
I’m doing some mandatory update training on Weds for a couple of hours and then my weekend will see me get stuck into some Uni work.
What is going to make things a little harder is my Mum will be away for a couple of weeks from tomorrow so I will have to keep on top of the washing and the ironing.
Or should I say…. the other four adults in this house will have to step up….. I’m just going to have to crack the whip.
Should be interesting.
Categories: General diary entries