I started blogging over ten year ago as a bit of fun and I’ve found it has become quite therapeutic. Somewhere to vent occasionally and let out my frustrations.
Mostly I post about things I love, things I’ve enjoyed doing and for the most part, the best bits in my life.

What you don’t see is what’s going on ‘behind the scenes’ so to speak.
The bad things.
Slowly building up until at some point, the surface bursts and out pour the emotions.

Well, this has just happened

I think I come across as a very cheerful ‘nothing can phase me’ kind of a person.
Well don’t judge a book by it’s cover.
When I started back at Uni I jokingly said there would be tears this year. I just didn’t expect them quite so soon.

The last month or so, I’ve been letting things build up, telling myself that everything is going to be OK when, in fact, I needed to take a time out.

Waiting on Marji’s Endoscopy results is frustrating more than worrying and will mean a change in diet and shopping if Coeliac is confirmed.

Ian’s incapacity and inability to be able to work with sick pay fast running out and possible treatment another couple of months away is suddenly making things sickeningly worrying.
The fact that his car is going in for an MOT it is probably going to fail on 5th May is not helping with the financial worry.

Uni work has been full on over the last few weeks and I’m still trying to get my head around where to start. It’s going to be a tough year.

To add to it all is that we are having the first of our twice yearly inspections from the rental agency on the 11th May which means that the garden needs a good tidy and the house needs a good spring clean from top to bottom. With Ian unable to do anything and the kids all doing their own thing with exams and college and work, this all falls on my head and I just don’t have that kind of spare time at the moment.
The last thing we need is to be kicked out of the house because we’re not looking after it!!

The only thing keeping me sane is work.
When I’m at work I get to think about everything but my own problems.
I work with a great team who never fail to make me laugh.
They are supportive and encouraging my learning.
I think this is why I had a little melt down yesterday when I had a chat with my manager.
That bubbling volcano finally erupted.

So, I am taking some last minute annual leave over the next few weeks.
I will still be doing Uni on Mondays and placements on Tuesdays and apart from one day where I’m still needed, I won’t be in my own work place again until 25th May.

Time to get the house in order and the inspection out of the way and time to get my head around my uni work.
Hopefully by that time we’ll also have an answer for Marji and Ian will at least be showing some signs of improvement.

Either that or a HUGE lotto win could be the answer!!!