It’s been a while since I updated ‘me’.
I’m usually gushing about movies and actors and sometimes, life just gets forgotten about but I suppose that’s the purpose of a good movie or hobby.

Anyway, what’s been happening with me.
Work continues.
I’m still in the middle of consolidation from Uni but placements are still a weekly thing.
I’m starting to feel a little like a fifth wheel at work with my reduced hours because of Uni, I just don’t have the time to get stuck into things the way I used to.
It will be good to get back there full time. I just have to get this course finished and then apply for the position and hope I get it.

I can’t say I’m looking forward to getting back to Uni.
The last couple of months have been lovely with no worrying about essays and deadlines but as that time is running out, I can’t help but think about the really difficult year ahead and if I’m really ready to tackle it.
The project I have set myself to take into year two now seems a little too ambitious but if it works, it will make a big difference for our parents and carers on the Unit.
I have to learn paediatric phlebotomy. YIKES!!
I will be learning about medicines and administration.
I will have at least one presentation to do and I don’t know how many essays to write.
The more I think about it, the more I’m feeling a little overwhelmed.

DEEP BREATH!

At the back of my mind, on top of all the worrying about Uni is the ongoing struggle with my knee.
Long story short….. Unknown Baker Cysts erupted in my right knee two years ago this month. Had me off my feet for three months. Follow ups from Orthopaedics and Physiotherapists had me back up to about 90% but left me with residual cysts and a medial meniscul tear. Would never be 100% again.
Things have been going good but I have noticed some deterioration in the last 3-4 months so I decided to go see the GP.

Not good news.
I’m being sent to get an up to date MRI but apart from that there’s nothing to do except keep up with the physio and the exercise.
I have a degenerative condition and Ortho’s won’t do anything until I physically can’t bend my knee anymore or it locks!!
Oh yeah, if a cyst is going to burst, it will burst!!

Great! Not what I need this year.
I can’t afford to be off my feet for another three months. There’s just no way I would be able to catch up on three months of missed placements in my own time.
So fingers crossed.

I’ve gotten myself into a bit of a downer thinking about it all and haven’t done myself any favours with all the junk food and drinking I’ve managed to do for at least the last 8 weeks.
I’ve undone a lot of the good work I did getting ready for Italy in the summer so Monday will see the start of the long slog back to the summer me and hopefully take it a little further.
It’s going to be a little harder this time around though as I need to be careful with the knee. Going out and about marching for an hour everyday may be pushing it a bit far.

I’ve started reading!
I’ve never been a huge reader. Until recently with ‘Holding the Man by Timothy Conigrave’, the last time I picked up a novel was when I was pregnant with Murron 21 years ago.
Anyway, I have just read the novel ‘Call Me By Your Name’ by Andre Aciman, to see where this beautiful film came from and absolutely loved it.
I have a habit of reading novels ‘after’ seeing a film’

As I was doing a little research into the lead actor of ‘Call Me By Your Name’, Timothee Chalamet, I noticed one of his next movies was called ‘Beautiful Boy’ which chronicles meth addiction and recovery through the eyes of a father who watches his son as he struggles with the disease.

No prizes for guessing which part Timothee is playing. It’s going to kill me.

The film is currently in post production with no release dates yet so I decided to try the novel ‘before’ the movie for a change.
The only thing is, I discovered 2 novels!!
The Father’s novel ‘Beautiful Boy: A Father’s Journey Through his Son’s Addiction’ by David Scheff.
And the Son’s novel ‘Tweak: Growing Up on Methamphetamines’ by Nic Scheff.

Two perspectives on the same story.
I’m actually really looking forward to reading them.

Anyway, that’s me at the moment.
Filled with anxiety about getting through this year…… or not as the case may be.
I want to see a new me by Xmas.
Physically and mentally.
I turn 50 next year and I want to be heading into that year with no worries or anxieties for a change.

Bring it on.